Mental block

I am having mental constipation. Maybe sticking a pen on my forehead will help. Or not.

It's enough to make you repurpose your midday meal

What a way to end the week! Yet another press release just peppered with a questionable word combination designed to make the writer of said release feel superior to the poor sap who has to read it.

Did you know that teaching in the corporate world is now called "knowledge transfer"? And did you know that "knowledge transfer" across multi-generational lines is wreaking such havoc in the work environment that specialized "facilitators of change" are being deployed to combat this modern day atrocity?

My theory on this is simple. If everyone spoke plain English (i.e., chuck the jargon, people!) we could all communicate more effectively. This would nearly eliminate "knowledge retention challenges" (i.e., stupidity) and give managers one less thing to worry about. Then maybe they could increase the budget so we can get some decent coffee in the lunch room.

Did I make myself clear?

Word abuses breed contempt

Since words are my bread and butter, I can be a bit sensitive about the "creative" use of terminology. I recently came across a press release from a finance-related organization announcing the participation of two new partners to its program. What caught my attention was the way this press release used livestock terminology and a questionable verb to describe its business partners. The sentence stated:

"The program leverages best of breed partners to handle call center operations and automated credit decisioning."

Best of breed? Is this a new way of saying cream of the crop? If I was one of those partners, would that make me a bitch? And what the hell is "automated credit decisioning"? Is decisioning really a verb? My spell check consistently denies the existence of this word. When did nouns turn into verbs? And who authorized such a transformation?

I remember when "cutting edge" morphed into "leading edge" when describing something so new and innovative that you'd have to wait at least two business days for the idea to catch up with you. Some people just love to conjure up words and phrases to make them appear smarter. They spout words like "synergy," claim to always be thinking "strategically" and have "paradigms" that shift on a regular basis. It's like they are screaming:

"Hey people! Look at me! I'm so edgy and complex!"

Oh, please.

I'm a get-to-the-point kind of gal. The abuse of adjectives and overuse of jargon, makes my head explode. (Hyperbole doesn't bother me as much.) I like messages to be just like me - short and to the point. Executive summaries are my friends. If people would communicate clearly, concisely, and honestly, then I think the world would be a much better place.